Celebrate your sickness
Upon arrival the triage administrator will interview you and make sure you complete all mandatory paperwork that is required for you to enter. This is a simple rights waiver form that gives the staff complete permission to exact any cures or therapies upon you they deem necessary for your well being.
The authority of the staff is absolute. Do not question their rights to examine or exact procedures on your mind, body or soul. They are skilled operators in their craft and require your total obedience for their treatments to have any curative effects on you.
Be aware medication will be dispensed, recreational therapy and group sessions will be administered for your benefit.
If you cannot take the bitter pill of medical salvation this is not a remedy for you!
PLEASE BE AWARE: Non of our procedures are approved by the BMA (British Medical Association)